A Contract with Dogs
A Contract With God, by Will Eisner is the story of a Jewish immigrant in New York City that make a sacred covenant with the titular sky tyrant. He will receive a tenement building as a holy boon and in return he will use it to house the diaspora flooding thru Ellis Island and build a community for them. He does does so for many years, but eventually gets greedy and sells to developers, at which point God smites his ass dead. It is widely considered to be the first modern graphic novel and is to my knowledge, the most influential Jewish morality text any ever recorded.
As a Jewish comic book connoisseur who is also dyslexic and stalwart pitbull advocate, I though I would be very clever indeed and write about how, actually, we did make a contract with dogs and have since betrayed them and that is why human civilization is so very fucked at the moment. I came up with some expertly contrived nonsense about how we were inscribing a contract between us and our Best Friends in DNA before we were inscribing contracts between other humans in stone. Then I came to a much simple and practical realization instead. It is in the best interests of both modern humans and modern dogs, especially pitbulls, if we just straight up reorganized human civilization to accommodate them. I present for your consideration, The Pitbull Political Platform:
- All home fit for human occupancy be large enough to comfortably accommodate at least two pitbulls as well as their human caretakers.
- All house holds should be food secure enough that feeding two extra pitbulls is a trivial matter.
- Urban centers have parks and green space within a reasonable walk from every given home.
- All interactions should be safe to walk dogs across.
I’m sure people smarter than me and think of many, many, agenda items more, but you can get the idea. By thinking about how we can best accommodate our oldest allies we will also build the world that is best for us.